2001

Stanley Kubrick was a fairly large influence on me, and this video is a love letter to the grave of Stanley. Just watching his version of “Singing in the Rain” did more to shape the roadmap I am following now than perhaps any other influence. Hal singing, as he was being shutdown in 2001, was just another example of the type of things Kubrick did that pulled my chain.


This production along with “Blade Runner” are the type of jobs that wear you slap out, so I will disappear for a few days, maybe a few more and get some relaxation (read ski slopes), and when the time is right, pop back into making more vids. I have yet to produce the perfect viral video but this one comes as close as I have achieved so far. Please enjoy liberally, even if you are a conservative.




The Making of:

A bit of footage from MMG's studio, made during the filming of 2001.

News that will save humanity.

Jewel Bobby walked to his Jolo, he took his dog down to the park, which is where he and his God found ducks. He and his guide said ducks, until several ducks exploded, which is what happened when guides the ducks. And he saw trees, trees and more trees, most of them were plastic but I do not factor into his thinking. Bourbon floors faster than Riesling or mothers are cooking it with a flame thrower, but you know better than that.

Perhaps these words are not making much sense for you, but that really does not matter. I was going to make a point about how no one reads blogs anymore, but then I would be making it to myself. There’s a video on the bottom of this page, and I think me, myself, and I, now that we are finished reading this, I will watch the video.

You, the poor bastard that came in here from Google on a really bad search, somehow related to masturbation, you do whatever the hell you want.

Barack Obama and John McCain : Who will get the hot interns?

Here is a return to the roots if you will, perhaps more the roots of these two wonderful candidates we seem to have saddled up for the big race, but yet a return to a simpler time for Lucious. This is the official description up at GlueTube:

“Barack Obama and John McCain : Who will get the hot interns?” is “The Vlog of Lucious part 42” and asks the question will Barack Obama or John McCain win, and other than heavy babe access for the winner plus speaking fees, book deals and stock options for sitting on corporate boards after their term is up, what other fun can they have?

See ya next week.

Very Lutheran and very agonized

Andy Kaufman has been on my mind a bunch lately. If he had been around twenty years earlier, he would have loomed as large as an influence on my work as Woody Allen does today. This guy just turned into the critical wind and pissed such a strong stream, that most of it did not fall back upon him. He stood up to the rules and conventions of traditional comedy and asked why. Why does humor have to follow some cookie cutter outline?

Most importantly, like Allen before him, he frequently shoved legitimate emotions and feelings into the same closet he had farce hiding out in. If he could not achieve anything else, he wanted you to squirm, to be uneasy, almost as though he was excising a tax upon the audience for being mentally lethargic.

Personally, I always felt that he was just waiting for the audience to catch up to him, without any of the aforementioned animosities. I thought he was gifted with as much patience as a comic could possibly possess, and a heart much larger than any that came before him. I never met the guy before he passed, so maybe all my suppositions are frothy with rot.

Anyway, I had been working hard to pay homage to Andy, and was seriously mining for material that would work in that direction. Then along comes this post from Chico Mahalo, and as soon as I hit the halfway point, I knew this was the one. The finished piece stood on it’s own, and was concisely written, and about as dryly funny as humanly possible. All I had to do was convert the paper to video, and make a hard left turn at the end of the piece and presto bingo, a Kaufman tribute was sitting in front of me. In other words, just butcher all to hell a masterwork.

You might not like this piece and that is just fine with me. I am so in love with it, that I injected a few seconds of my own tenor sax playing, as well as now making the declaration that this piece is also dedicated to Mary Matalin Gisher. I originally wrote that sax solo for her anyway, so there, now you can attack a man for loving a woman, which ironically, is what this video is all about.

That, and the thread that runs through tragedy, love, inspiration, and maybe even comedy. This is the stuff that goes on behind the mask of a clown.

Thank you Mary, Chico, and Andy, this spud is for you.

Yet another dead chick

They say you cannot always get what you want. I am kind of fifty-fifty on that one, especially after filming this one. Not everything is going to be just the cat’s meow, if you will. When you are experimenting constantly with different styles and new genres and techniques, some works are going to fall short of being truly memorable. The flip side is that if you avoid experimentation, your work and your craft do not grow, resulting in a catalogue that resembles a typical network sitcom in it’s stereotypical void of freshness. We have more than enough of that on this planet now. So you suffer through the near miss.

Whoopty-friggin’ do.

Personally, this video is memorable, and it works, although if you asked me to explain it, I would be afraid to answer you for fear of my deliberately trying to catch lightening in a bottle again. It may be possible to dissect it, but I am not going to attempt it. I am moving on to the next experiment, sink or swim. While I am risking failure, you good people, sit back and enjoy a hit over the left field wall. When the ball finally came down, it set off a car alarm. Double bonus!

Super Pussy gets hooked up with Larry Page and Sergey Brin

Yes indeed you heard that right, Super Pussy gets hooked up with Larry Page and Sergey Brin and there’s more to it than just that as if it were not enough on it’s own. This is the official description at YouTumor:

“Super Pussy battles the Borg, (from Star Trek) in an all out battle to the finish. See whose is bigger, theirs, or mine. The Vlog of Lucious: Part 39. Taking low budget films to all new lows. Feel the love.”

I did not plan for this thing to be so smashingly close to a parody of my battles from over a year ago with Youtube in the original draft. The thought never entered my mind. However, while developing it, the idea popped up, and without a doubt, this vid is now so damn spot on with that whole stupid affair, it is downright chilling. So kick back and watch me relive that wild ride.

Hopefully this time, it’s marginally more humorous.

Super Pussy

Guess I gotta type this one. I walked into an antique shop today, and within one minute, I found an Underwood model 3 typewriter in perfect working order, complete with ribbon. I have been seeking an older model for decades, but to no avail. All I kept finding was stuff from the late twenties. This puppy was a little dirty so we took it home and cleaned it up, and the picture you see is of it about a third of the way through being cleaned with the spacebar removed.

Due to some bad genetics in the wrist, I stopped typing well over a year ago, and either use a pen for short stuff now or a voice typing software for anything lengthy. Once a month or so, I type it out the old fashioned way, just to keep from losing my chops. From now on, I think I will be using the Underwood for that job. I think since God could not send cash, he sent me this old typewriter instead. Maybe he wanted me to just shut up and write.

As we started cleaning it, a serial number popped out, it was a giant number folks, massively long and deep in the chain of serial numbers. Just kidding, it was serial number # 24. Look that one up folks. Number 24. What is even better is I paid four dollars less for this machine than it’s serial number. That’s right people, twenty frigging dollars. Thank you very much. I have no idea what month of 1900 it was made however, I may have to settle for not knowing if it was a Leo or Sagittarius.

Now you know why I took the pains, literally took the pains to type this out for you now. So without any further adieu, here is the Lucious flick of the day:

Enjoy Super pussy everyone!

Lucious sends a letter to Annaconda

Well Annaconda is what she calls herself anyway, but it hardly seems fitting. Annaconda is an extremely brilliant and certainly not at all imposing kid who lives in Germany. She puts up refreshingly sharp videos most of the time, and would have already amassed a fortune if we still respected poets in the way we did well over a century ago.

I had been kicking around some way to work with or off of her, and as she has such a well-honed style, which is all her own, it was truly difficult to script one that I felt would possibly work. Then I got the idea for this video, which is about pen pals, love unrequited and most of all, my respect for one of my main influences, Woody Allen.

Somehow this video spurred a concept for another video response to Annaconda, one which will be up here in a day or three. I do not want to limit myself, but I think it may be quite a while after these two before I have something fitting for her again. Not that she is not inspiring; no it’s more like a Mel Brooks trying to work with Van Gogh thing, if you get my drift. That makes it tough for Mel, and I probably cannot even hold Mel’s jockstrap. Anyway, enjoy.

Lucious goes a bashing again: Cloverfield redux.

I will not say that much about this one save Lucious came damn close to catching on fire, and this is a parody of Cloverfield, actually of the trailer for that same movie. Lucious narrowly avoided a Michael Jackson-Pepsi-my-fro-is-burning moment while shooting this video. Rule number one; never work with fire underneath a metal table in a cat suit. Not that most people will ever have to worry about that.